Doctor Disappointments

So, to start out with, I should point out that it's a very bad idea to scratch insect bites. I normally don't, but I got one right in the crook of my elbow and it drove me nuts, so I scratched the bejesus out of it. And of course, it got infected. Normally not too big a deal, a little Neosporin and on your way, right? Well, by yesterday afternoon, it was pretty swollen, there was a red spot around 4" in diameter surrounding it, and, most concerning, a 1/2" wide red streak extending about 4" up my arm from it. Needless to say, I decided I should go see the doctor.

I had to go to the Urgent Care center, as it was after 5 (side note: doctor's office hours blow), which means I had to pay extra, but whatever. I sat in a waiting room for about 45 minutes, then after that, I sat in an exam room for another 30 minutes. In the end, it was diagnosed as an infection, the very conclusion I came to myself, and I was prescribed some anti-biotics, as I anticipated. I'm not saying I can do a doctor's job, but it's always frustrating to go to the doctor to get a diagnosis you already made, just because you can't prescribe your own medicine. I suppose in the end, it's ALWAYS a good idea to go to the doctor just to be on the safe side, especially with things like infections. I trust the internet for a lot of things - advice on video games, directions to places, movie reviews, etc. But I don't trust it for my health.

However, the biggest disappointment wasn't the $65 I had to dish out because I am a dumbass and couldn't not scratch a bug bite. The disappointment was Doctor Bhatt.

Now, Doctor Bhatt was a fine doctor - she was friendly, competent, informative, etc. However, when they told me I would be seeing "Doctor Bhatt", I heard it as "Doctor Bot". So, I immediately began thinking to myself how awesome it would be if my doctor was, in fact, a Transformer. This of course led me to the question, what is the better name for said Transformer doctor? I boiled it down to Optimus Doc, or Doctormus Prime. Right now, I am leaning toward Doctormus Prime, but I am always open to input.

I guess maybe it is a bit arrogant of me to automatically assume that I would be getting the Autobot leader as my doctor. I mean, if Optimus Prime was a doctor, you know he'd be some sort of super neuro-surgeon or something like that. Not someone moonlighting at an urgent care center to look at bug bites. But really, I would have even settled for this:


This could also be the nerdiest thing I have ever written.